worry.

mother worries a lot. she can worry about almost everything. from too noisy to too quiet. from the small stuff like alarm clock not ringing till the big stuff like kids' well-being in schools. so how does a mother cope with everything? Doing other thing while the mind is diverted to think of another thing?

these days I worried damn much. what if they fail to achieve their milestone and got left behind? what if they x manage to become what I want them to become? what if they refuse to become what I want them to become? what if what I've done so far is insufficient? what if I just fail miserably just because I lack the knowledge of becoming a good mother? what if I can't become a role model because I used to become who I used to be? what if they know too much already and I can't control what to be input into their mind? and what if  I simply not ready to become a mother?

I believe it's every mom wish to be a supermom. they can juggle everything with their two mighty hands and not sweat at all. they can go anywhere with their children and manage them well and not shouting at their children to behave in the store. they can bring the kids to the playground, cook dinner later and not feeling tire at all. they can go to bed as early as 12 midnight and wake up at 5 to prepare everything for the kids. off to work without feeling sleepy and come back and do the same routine all over again. weekends are full with activities to keep the kids occupy and house chores are never delayed. in short, they can do everything, taking care of everyone including themselves and never complain.

to mothers out there, don't you wish you can become like this? bold and strong and never complain! give me some time and i surely can become one! oh thank you deng for always being there w'pun kena kerepak, anok and diberik muka yg masam. heart!