voila !

i think it's clear to me. what i want out of this effing life !

but wait. i don't think i can make it. because there's so many things i want in my life and they're contradicting each other. oh my !

now tell me what do i want out of this life ? zzz.

août baby !

found this on the tumblr. IMHO 95% accurate :D

AUGUST=ATTITUDE outgoing personality. takes risks. feeds on attention (yeah !). self control. kind hearted. Self confident. loud and boisterous. VERY revengeful (VERY indeed !). easy to get along with and talk to. has an “every thing’s peachy” attitude. likes talking and singing. loves music. daydreamer. easily distracted. Hates not being trusted. BIG imagination. loves to be loved (this is so true). hates studying (erk? disagree). in need of “that someone” (can i say i need everyone?). longs for freedom. rebellious when withheld or restricted (told ya !). lives by “no pain no gain” caring. always a suspect. playful. mysterious. “charming” or “beautiful” to everyone. stubborn (totally agree !). curious.. independent. strong willed. a fighter.

oh ! God's creation is marvelous ! agree not ? (:

Taken from NASA's Atronomy Pictures

anuptaphobia. am i ?

i went through the Phobia List just now. and there's one description of phobia which caught my attention. FEAR OF STAYING SINGLE. *giggles*

now i really need to sort my life and get to know what i really want out of it. can't stop questioning where is this life heading to. and i can feel the time is coming soon. really soon than the mind could ever imagine. are you prepared yet? cause i'm not ! *sigh*

the 12th 28.

its the 12th 28 we've been gone through together. i pray that His blessings be upon us and for unfailing and unconditional love to continue bond us together. Amin.

be bold and never give up.

because the most famous pancreatic cancer, Randy Pausch once said, Experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted.

thus, this will be my new motto for the year twenty eleven ! cheers ! (=

i'm coming home.

there's this one particular song which i LOVE effing much. and it suits the mood i'm having right now. (:

you-tube it yo ! til then, take care peeps. and have a blessed x-mas.

I'm Coming Home by J. Cole

I’m coming home
I’m coming home
tell the World I’m coming home
Let the rain wash away all the pain of yesterday
I know my kingdom awaits and they’ve forgiven my mistakes
I’m coming home, I’m coming home
tell the World I’m coming

Back where I belong
I’ve never felt so strong eh
feeling like there’s nothing that I can’t try
and if you feel me put your hands high, high, high, hey
and if you feel me put your hands high, high, hey

This is my story this is my song
if you aint got the heart, don’t attempt to try this at home
it’s just a poem from a man once living wrong
now I’m in the zone, tell the World I’m coming home
been a long time coming, been a long time coming
this song feel like the greatest of all time coming
cause I do it B-I-G, I remember we would be high
who’d have thoguht we’d be running rap when we was knee high
to appreciate the sun you gotta know what rain is
or cause I’m famous you don’t gotta know what pain is
but I bounce back, would ya look at that
I take my spot at the top and I aint looking back

I’m coming home
I’m coming home
tell the World I’m coming home
Let the rain wash away all the pain of yesterday
I know my kingdom awaits and they’ve forgiven my mistakes
I’m coming home, I’m coming home
tell the World I’m coming

Hey, confusion like I was losing my mind
but one thing I never lose is my grind
my closet need a lot of cleaning now
I can’t sleep cause I dont like the sh-t I dream about
hey Dear Lord please help me get the demons out
and then help me get my genius out
and get back to what I had
if my good’s outweigh my bads, do you think my mistakes is gon even out (even out)
I guess try and see, it’s on my diary, I’m living for my kids
now they is just as fly as me
talk well, wonder if Andre Harrell knew how great I would be when he fired me

I’m coming home
I’m coming home
tell the World I’m coming home
Let the rain wash away all the pain of yesterday
I know my kingdom awaits and they’ve forgiven my mistakes
I’m coming home, I’m coming home
tell the World I’m coming…home

too dear for me.

it's funny how people love to assume one's feeling. heh !

it's christmas eve tonight but i don't have the mood for any celebration. i just wanna snug in my bed and read books. but i'm in for any karaoke and lepaking session !

oh i miss his voice. can't wait for him to come home.

ache !

not that i wanna brag. but i am seriously good in rebellion. watch me, just watch me.

twenty ten.

and it's almost the end of the year 2010. it has been 1 year since i left my uni life. there's only 1 word i would like to use to describe those moments i've spent during those 5 freaking years. MEMORABLE. worth to be remembered despite all those sadness and tears i might shed while working on my FYP. nightmare indeed !

so let me conclude what i've 'achieved throughout this year of twenty ten.

1) went for sime darby management trainee interview in KL. there were 4 stages in total and i was defeated at the third stage. the individual presentation must be the 1 which spoiled it all. ahh never mind with that.

2) i got my self a job without any formal interview since i've undergone a short period attachment with them during my internship in MLNG. yippie !

3) something happened during the month of may which i shall never forget for the rest of my life. couldn't share much though. i just pray that something like that would never ever happen again in the future. i can rest assure you it was an 'achievement' for 'us' ! :p

4) my convocation ! unfortunately CGPA of 3.62 is considered second class upper. pfft !

i think that's all i could think off right now. im not in d mood to work as holiday is coming soon ! i can smell you oh christmas. pls be fun this year.

the joy of the heart.

oh giggle ! can't wait for the day to come. be safe kesayangan. heart you deeply.

i'll stay !

despite anything that had happened, i will stay. trust me !

oh oh. my 7876's tire got punctured yesterday and it was indeed a formidable experience because i was driving ALONE after my lecture and was on my way to the airport fetching someone who had waited for me for more than an hour. oh my ! and the road was dark and silent. creepy aite ? oh please understand the pressure that i'm having at that very moment ! i am that type of segaut n fear-of-being-kidnapped person okay ! so i continued to drive for about 20 mins until i reached the airport safely. yeay !

psst ! i won't stop by the roadside just to replace the tire. hell no ! i would rather wait in the car for my dad or any 3 other heroes in the house to come and 'save' me. yeah i am a spoiled child so eat it !

kill and be dead!

i feel so damn insecure right now and it's killing me !! please shower me the courage to deal with this pathetic feelings of insecurity. ):

be dead oh ye insecure feelings. kill you !

eiffel i'm in LOVE !

i've been dreaming, planning, dreaming again, planning again so much lately about a trip to this particular place. i am so deeply in LOVE with it. >.< !

raise up both hands if you think it is beautiful. fascinating view ain't it ?

please please let me fly to Paris !

crazieyy

have you ever gone crazy for something that you adore so much but can't get your hands on it?

i do !

.

now someone please convince me that i do can get my hands on this one. cos i seriously want it so effing freaking lots.

180 km/h

i love driving fast. no i don't love fast cars. or maybe perhaps sometimes i do. i enjoy the adrenaline rush. when it comes to a corner i will step harder on the paddle and watch the instantaneous response of brain reflex action. and at the very moment when i feel like the car is going to crash, my mind would go blank. all the troubles and mind-bothering issues will be just gone. disappear. that is the moment that i long for. when you simply don't give a damn thought on those problems and you feel so free.

but are we still human when there's nothing to be worried about?

definition of PAIN

i used to watch the series Kyle XY last time during my uni time. you know just to kill the boredom when you were left alone with monkeys jumping in excitement as the uni were all theirs when it came to mid semester break. now tell me how pathetic was i back then being left alone in the uni n staring at the laptop screen all day long. T_T!

oh ! back to the subject. definition of PAIN. do any of you knows the definition of PAIN ?

According to http://medical-dictionary.thefreedictionary.com/pain,

Pain is an unpleasant feeling that is conveyed to the brain by sensory neurons.

Straight forward huh? but what if the brain defines PAIN differently ? I mean everyone has different set of brain. if we could give a scale to PAIN, everyone of us might produce different results. Agree ? if i pinch a guy, he might feel no PAIN, if i pinch another guy he might scream due to the unpleasant feeling, kan ? of course i would pinch with equal force.

so how do we actually define PAIN ? it all depends on the mind. it is a state of mind. well, according to Kyle of Kyle XY (i can't remember which season which epi, but i can remember the exact phrase he used yo !), to reduce the PAIN all you need to do is to control the mind. The phrase that he used was "mind over body". so whenever you feel pain, try to control your mind. chant something like "no PAIN, no PAIN, x sakit, x sakit" and see if it works. once your mind is over your body, you would eventually control the intensity of the pain.

why do i bother to share about this topic ? i have no idea too !

later peeps!

grant me a wish oh dear you almighty

i wish to grow wiser each and everyday.

pour me some of your enormous knowledge.

random thought

there is this one particular thought which came to me whenever i feel sad. and the thought starts with the question 'what if' and followed by 'will i be happier?'.

what if i did not take that particular action at that particular time, will i be happier ?

but hye ! why regret and be sad ? ain't life wonderful and full of mistery with all the ups and downs ?

tell me

what time is it now ?

off to bed ! bonne nuit y'all ! (: